i don’t want to be in this world anymore

this is not a cry for help or some suicidal elegy

it’s quiet here and i’m too tired to think

about why i can’t sleep in the evening

or is it because i can’t sleep in the evening

 

i don’t know how to live in this world anymore

i should probably have started with that

but maybe i wanted the shock factor…

or maybe that was just the simple truth…

or maybe…

my thoughts are muddled and my words come out too quickly

when i start to be okay i wake to another day that i need to be me

i can never remember when i fell asleep but i know i don’t sleep as much as the experts or your grandma recommend

how is she by the way?

 

the sun rises and i burrow deeper

away from and into this darkness

the sun rises, reminding me how unprepared i am for any kind of news

good or bad

old or new

 

i am more prepared to face anyone else’s pain than i am to face mine

my mind is the most powerful numbing agent i’ve found

i feel your problems consuming mine, cutting right through

your tears cut through my hollow bones like acid rain

i should’ve brought an umbrella


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